Why online dating doesn’t work

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Written By Of Like Minds

15+ years of experience in online dating and coaching clients to get better partners!

Online dating has become a popular way for people to meet potential partners in recent years. However, despite its popularity, many people have found that online dating doesn’t work for them. There are several reasons for this, ranging from people being dishonest in their profiles to the overwhelming number of options available. In this article, we will delve deeper into the reasons why online dating doesn’t work and provide some tips on how to navigate the world of online dating successfully. If you’ve ever felt frustrated with online dating or are considering giving it a try, keep reading to learn more.

Why Online Dating Doesn’t Work

Online dating has become a popular way for people to meet potential partners. With the rise of dating apps and websites, finding a date has become more accessible than ever. However, despite the convenience and ease of use, online dating doesn’t work for everyone. In this article, we’ll explore the reasons why online dating doesn’t work for some people.

1. The Paradox of Choice

One of the biggest problems with online dating is the paradox of choice. With so many options available, it can be overwhelming for people to choose just one person to date. This can lead to a feeling of anxiety and indecision, which can ultimately sabotage the dating process.

2. The Dehumanization of Dating

Another issue with online dating is the dehumanization of dating. When we communicate with someone through a screen, it’s easy to forget that they are a real person with thoughts, feelings, and emotions. This can lead to people treating each other poorly or with less respect than they would in person.

3. The Lack of Authenticity

Online dating also suffers from a lack of authenticity. People often present a curated version of themselves online, which can be misleading or inaccurate. This can lead to disappointment when people meet in person and realize that the person they’ve been talking to online isn’t who they thought.

4. The Matching Algorithms

Many online dating websites and apps use matching algorithms to connect people. While these algorithms can be effective in some cases, they can also be limiting. People may miss out on potential matches because they don’t fit the algorithm’s criteria, even though they could be a great match in reality.

5. The Lack of Chemistry

Chemistry is an essential part of any relationship, but it’s hard to gauge online. People may have great conversations online, but when they meet in person, there may be no chemistry. This can lead to disappointment and frustration for both parties.

6. The Stigma of Online Dating

Despite the popularity of online dating, there is still a stigma attached to it. Some people see online dating as desperate or unsuccessful, which can make it harder for people to find a partner online. This stigma can also lead to people feeling ashamed or embarrassed about using online dating, which can further sabotage the dating process.


While online dating can be a great way to meet potential partners, it doesn’t work for everyone. The paradox of choice, dehumanization of dating, lack of authenticity, matching algorithms, lack of chemistry, and stigma of online dating are all factors that can make online dating unsuccessful. If you’re struggling with online dating, it’s important to remember that there are other ways to meet people. Joining social groups or attending events that align with your interests can be a great way to connect with like-minded people. Ultimately, finding a partner takes time, patience, and a bit of luck.

Frequently Asked Questions

Why do many people find online dating ineffective?

There may be several reasons why some people do not find success with online dating. One reason could be that individuals may not accurately represent themselves on their dating profiles. Another reason could be that people may have unrealistic expectations or may not be putting in enough effort to communicate with potential matches. Additionally, some people may simply not be compatible with the individuals they are matched with online.

Is online dating a waste of time?

Online dating can be a valuable tool for individuals looking to meet new people and potentially find a romantic partner. However, it is important to approach online dating with a realistic mindset and to be aware that not every match will result in a successful relationship. It is ultimately up to the individual to decide whether online dating is a worthwhile investment of their time and energy.

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