A family member, friend,
coworker, neighbor or other concerned individual who cares about someone
who is living with a mental illness can help in many ways. Your commitment
to them can help them to feel supported in their recovery efforts, to
feel safe and to begin to enjoy life.
How can you help?
Depression, anxiety and bipolar disorders can make people feel isolated and alone, causing them to withdraw from
family and friends. You could call every other evening to check in or
meet with them once a week. They may feel hopeless at times, finding it
difficult to do things they once enjoyed, or took pride in doing well.
You could provide encouragement.
Consider your strengths
and also the amount of time you have to give. If you can help with some
everyday tasks, you could offer to do grocery shopping or take children
to activities. If you're detail-oriented, you could help him/her complete
insurance forms and explain benefits. Perhaps, you're a good listener
and can offer much needed emotional support.
Let your friend or
family member know they can count on your help. Tell him or her, "You
don't have to go through this alone. I'm here if you need me."
 Educate
yourself
- Accept the fact
that the person has a legitimate illness.
- Learn all that
you can about their disorder and its treatment so that you can more
effectively cope, help, and keep your expectations realistic.
Communicate effectively
- Be understanding.
Let your family member or friend continually know that you care. Engage
him/her in conversation and listen carefully.
- Use humor (when
appropriate).
- Try not to become
angry at your friend or family member. Don't get stuck in talking about
the past - stay in the present.
- Don't tell your
family member to just "get over it" or to "get a life."
- Don't try to be
his/her therapist.
Help your friend
or family member stay active.
- Invite him/her
for walks, to the movies and other activities.
- Encourage participation
in activities that once gave pleasure, such as hobbies, sports, religious
or cultural activities.
- Do not push him/her
to undertake too much too soon. Too many demands can increase feelings
of failure.
Offer Practical
Support
- Cook dinner once
a week.
- Drive him/her to
doctor's appointments.
- Run errands.
- Arrange a regular
time to walk or go to the gym together.
Help with medical
needs
- Encourage him/her
to maintain professional medical help.
- Encourage him/her
to be open with their healthcare provider about their symptoms and their
progress.
- Help with healthcare
paperwork if you can.
- Help him/her identify
emotional and physical symptoms.
- With your friend's
or family member's cooperation, help him/her with tracking medications,
perhaps filling a weekly compartmentalized medication container, making
medical appointments, and reporting changes to the medical professional.
- Keep a log of the
patient's symptoms, responses to medications, etc.
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Help
them recognize recovery
- Someone with depression,
bipolar or anxiety disorders has difficulty recognizing indications
of improvements.
- Point out small
signs of progress, by saying things like: "You laughed tonight more
than you have in a long time.", "I see you're working in your garden
again."
Develop a crisis
plan.
- Talk to your family
member or friend about what you will do if there is a crisis and what
will happen, such as hospitalization. Put the plan in writing.
Nurture the family/couple
- Mental illness
affects the whole family. Meeting with the medical professional from
time to time as a family can be very helpful.
- Marriages in which
a spouse is living with a psychiatric disorder have a higher likelihood
of ending in divorce. Couples therapy can help sustain your relationship
as you work together through this difficult time.
Take care of the
caregiver
- It's important
that you take care of yourself as you take care of the person who is ill.
- Spend time with
other people you care about.
- Take time off,
if you need to.
- Make time for activities
that are personally fulfilling.
- Keep a journal of your feelings.
- Talk to other people
who are struggling with similar situations, perhaps in a support
group.
- Talk to other family
members about sharing responsibilities.
Protect against suicide risk
- The risk of suicide
in people with major depressive disorder is about 20 times that of the
general population.
- Do not be afraid
to speak directly. To determine if someone is having thoughts of suicide,
try asking: "Are you thinking about giving up?" "Do you need help to
keep yourself safe?"
- If you feel there
is a risk, seek professional help immediately.
Sources
Families for Depression Awareness
Michelle
D. Sherman, Ph.D.
National Women's Health
Resource Center and Eli Lilly and Company
Free
training for family members
The NAMI Family-to-Family
Education Program is a free 12-week course for family caregivers
of individuals with psychiatric disorders. The course discusses
the clinical treatment of these illnesses and teaches the knowledge
and skills that family members need to cope more effectively. Family-to-Family
classes are offered in hundreds of communities across the country,
in two Canadian provinces, Puerto Rico and Mexico.
View
the current Family-to-Family course schedule. |
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